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You are not going to jump up from the table and run out to the stores Thanksgiving night. No, you are not. Thanksgiving Day is meant to be spent with family and loved ones. So loosen your belt, tuck into that second helping of pie, and listen to your blue-haired Aunt Myrtle ask you when you’re getting married for the umpteenth time.

Then you may shower, change into comfortable clothes, and sleep (yes, in those same clothes) until 2:45 am, at which time you may rise and hit the stores like a normal human being. And after you’ve elbowed your way through throngs of people to acquire those 40% off deals, surviving solely on half a stale sesame seed bagel and weak coffee, you can then call it a morning and head directly to one of these lovely places for Black Friday deals. On Friday, not Thursday.  Have I made myself clear?

Firefly in Dupont Circle is known for its cheap brunch cocktails, so head to this charming Kimpton Hotel outpost for $3 mimosas and $4 Bloodys, plus snake eyes (!) from the brunch menu.

1905 Restaurant will be offering its hearty Cajun brunch fare, along with bottomless mimosas and Bloodys, plus some holiday specials. 1905 9th Street NW, Washington, DC.  (202) 332-1905

Do you like your waffles Belgian? Stuffed? Sweet or savory? Belga Cafe in Capitol Hill has it all, and opens at 10 am to feed your needs.  514 8th Street SE, Washington DC.  (202) 544-0100

For a first-class kind of Black Friday, The Grill Room at the Rosewood Hotel in Georgetown is serving light fare–because frankly, we’re still full–and will even gift wrap all your purchases. Thank goodness, because we’re too weak from eating to lift a finger anyway.  1050 31st Street NW, Washington, DC. (202) 617-2410

If that sounds too highbrow, then get to the raunchy but entertaining $24 drag brunch at Nellie’s Sports Bar. Get a free mimosa–but plan to show up early as seats fill up quickly.  900 U Street NW, Washington, DC. (202) 332-6355

Free sugar alert! Order an entrée at Osteria Marzano in Alexandria, and get a free one of its insane desserts–the Nutella Pizza with Nutella, sea salt, whipped mascarpone pistachios, and baby marshmallows.  6361 Walker Lane, Alexandria, VA. (703) 313-9700